How To Distinguish Between a Crisis And The End Of a Relationship?

a Relationship

Love does not prevent crises, but it can become the main element of support, to find a solution.

How the problems are overcome depends on a couple, referring to a conflictive stage, talk about a crisis or perceive it as what was the beginning of the end.

Fear of change.

There are no fixed criteria to be used to determine if a relationship is already at an end. In addition, the longer that union has been and when the rupture affects more people – children are the argument that many people are wishing to continue living, despite the crisis -, the more difficult it will be to make the decision to break.

It could be said that the moment in which a relationship ceases to contribute to the members of the couple that set of elements that propitiated it – affectivity and emotion, security, sexual enjoyment … -, the point of inflection in which Must produce change.

It is not surprising that there are self-deceptions, more or less conscious, that arise as resistance to change, either to rethink the couple and move forward with changes, or to definitely start a separation.

Simple crisis or separation?

Depending on the way in which a crisis is dealt with, how the members of the couple behave before that stage, the union will be strengthened or will be the first phase of the end.

That is to say, before a conflictive phase of the couple the question is not “is this the end?”, But “I want it to be the end ?, I am interested in continuing the commitment that this relationship entails?”.

In short, a bad run will be only a crisis if it is overcome, but it will become a separation if the union ends. The answer to some questions can give us clues that will help us to make a decision in this difficult conjuncture: I love you?

Do we look together in the same direction, do we have the same goal? Do I feel deep interest in the other person? Do you want it? Do I have total trust in the other? And in the relationship itself? Do I reflect and commit myself to see what I can bring to the other person and our relationship to improve it?

In crisis phase our emotional state is altered; Therefore, let us keep in mind the scope of the decisions, especially if you choose to end the relationship.

Not two people are separated, but sometimes a family with children, a whole network of relationships and friends, economic dependencies, so if the couple encounters obstacles that prevent reflection, it is wise to go to one or one Specialist in issues of couple.

To strengthen the couple.

We must use or develop these skills:

Accept that our life is entirely our responsibility. Do not expect the other partner to make us happy. Our happiness depends, above all, on ourselves. Let us not deceive ourselves.

Knowing that we do not have to solve the other person’s life, looking for solutions, giving him advice and setting the guidelines for how he should live his life.

Learn to listen. For this we must leave what we are doing, empty ourselves of other thoughts that distract our attention and try to put us in its place to understand how it feels.

Learn to dialogue. Our opinion, way of understanding and apprehending reality are not the absolute truth, but ours alone.

Learn to agree. Mine and yours have to be taken into account and debated in order to get to define “ours”.

Learn to share. Give each other: ask how you are, what bothers you, what you want and want.

Learn to ask. Showing our vulnerability is the best example of love, since we do not teach it to anyone.

Dedicate specific time for the couple.

Share hobbies, playful times, fantasies and illusions, as well as accompany in sad, hard and painful moments.

Sharing the economy. It is part of the relationship.

Learn to use conflicts and crises, to learn more about ourselves, to see what we need and what the pain we cause in our partner.

Let them be a springboard for development and not stagnation that leads nowhere. Let’s talk as much as necessary, so that the problem is not stuck. There is no greater disaster than silence.

Pamper the couple with pride. The sex, the caresses and the “I love you” have to be said, they have to be made explicit. The misunderstandings are not worth it.


What You Should Not Do After a Loving Breakup

What You Should Not Do After a Loving Breakup

After a Loving Breakup

As difficult as it is to assume the rupture of a relationship and to face the duel, it is necessary to go ahead and not live your present with the memories of the past.

We tell you what not to do to make the separation less traumatic. With the passage of time you will feel much better.

What You Should Not Do After a Loving Breakup.

– Leave it in your contacts: The first and most important step after a breakup is to remove the character from everything, which means phone directory, social networks and any means of contact with that person.

Do not return letters, cards and in general any detail that at the time meant something valuable; If seeing these elements does you more harm, put them in secret, but do not give them back. You do not want to stand before him like a teenager.

– After a Loving Breakup NOT Use blackmail and manipulations: If your goal is to keep you on your side resort to blackmail or “moorings”, such as not taking care of you sexually to become pregnant, it will not work.

Besides, you will end up suffering. Phrases like “If you let me kill myself” will not do either.

– Beg? Never!: If he no longer loves you, he left you for another or there are differences in the relationship that could never reconcile; It is best to let it go with dignity.

If you beg her not to leave you, the only thing you will achieve is to feel worse, because, besides having a broken heart, you yourself violated your dignity as a woman and he left.

– After a Loving Breakup not Make jealousy with another person: Does a nail get another nail? Not in this case. Give time to the time.

Heal your heart first and then prepare it to love again, but if what you do is throw yourself in the arms of the first that appears to you on the way, be aware that it is not the best option. It’s not fair to that new person or to yourself.

– “Stalkearlo”: Social networks are the worst invention when you end a relationship, because they are a way to keep in touch with what we resist to eliminate our life.

However, becoming a professional stalker or a hidden researcher on social networks will only make you aware of details you do not want to know.

– After a Loving Breakup not Try to know about him: Neither by his friends, nor through his family, nor in any way try to know what has happened to him or if he is dating another person, because this will only deepen the wound and will be an obstacle to remove it by Full of your mind, your heart and your life.


9 Rules For Solving Problems Of Couple, According To Common Sense

9 Rules For Solving Problems Of Couple, According To Common Sense

Although it may not seem so at times, we are rational beings. And if sometimes it does not seem to be because when the anger invades us, the mind is clouded to us and perhaps what comes out of our mouth is not the most appropriate to solve our problems of couple.

Problems Of Couple.. We may vent for a brief period of time, but in the long run, we will end up causing serious havoc in our coexistence.

And it is not that we do not know how to treat our partner, but in those critical moments we lose what precisely should be more important, common sense.

You know what the nice new saying proverb says: “Do not argue with a fool, because it will first make you go down to your level and then you will beat with your experience.”

Something similar can be applied to the world of relationships, in which we must avoid being dragged into the spiral in which the other person seems to have fallen.

Rather than counterattack more and more strongly, it may be smarter to rescue our partner from his own stupidity and help him keep his head cool.

Or, if this is not possible, keep the following advice in mind the next time the subject is about to get out of hand.

Remember Ockham’s Knife – Problems Of Couple.

The English Franciscan friar Guillermo de Ockham illuminated what would later be known as the principle of parsimony, which goes on to say that under equal conditions, the simpler theory is more likely to be correct than the complex one.

This comes as we begin to build castles in the air and to attribute unsuspected causes to our partner’s behavior.

Probably the simplest explanation is the true one, and if you have forgotten to call you, it is because you have really forgotten it, not because you were quoted with your lover in a hotel on the outskirts of the city.

Problems Of Couple

Why are you angry? Problems Of Couple.

Try to answer that question and discard the first answer: in many cases, surely what has infuriated you is not the object of the discussion that is being maintained, but another reason more profound or perhaps a very specific problem that has not yet been solved .

In other cases, not even your partner will be to blame for your anger, but this may have been caused in another area (work, family) and it is she who is paying the dishes.

Stop and let the other person explain yourself

It is not only a matter of counting up to ten between exabruto and exabrupto, but also in letting the other person explain himself and present his version of the facts before your accusations.

This may prevent an increase in voltage to a point of no return and solve the problem without raising the pitch or bring up other issues.

Our mind works faster than our language, and sometimes a simple conversation without raising the voice serves to turn the shadows into light.

Problems Of Couple – Review your arguments

Many people begin to argue with a clear idea in their head about what they have to say, especially if it is they who begin the confrontation.

Since we know the lesson so well, it may be necessary to review our argument before pronouncing it aloud and, in that way, to check if what we suggest is true or if it is a mere ploy to make our partner feel bad. If so, it may be preferable to swallow our words.

Do it at the right time.

To properly discuss something that bothers us, we also need to know when to do it. The worst moment is, of course, when the tension is about to explode or in the midst of an interminable cross of accusations, when the emotions make us air those annoying dirty rags that every couple has.

But perhaps it is also not appropriate to take advantage of the good romantic roll to bring to light the little problem that happened a month ago and that until then we had not dared to comment…

Problems Of Couple – Do not ask for what you can not give.

The stability of a couple relationship must be forged in the more or less symmetrical balance between the two members:

Before accusing the other person it may be appropriate to stop and think about whether we are in a position to demand something like this from the other person or whether it is preferable, for the sake of both, to overlook small details that in our case have also been passed for high.

An argument can not be won, only lose

What is the end of any discussion of a couple? To exchange expletives until one of the two gives up and, convinced, ask forgiveness to his partner and accept that this is absolutely right and nothing but reason?

Or simply to make him understand that one of his behaviors has bothered us and that in consecutive it is preferable to think twice before doing something like that again?

Recall that many people have won discussions, but in return, they have lost their partners.

Problems Of Couple – Feelings are not discussed.

The judicial system may be fallible at times, but the history of the laws has provided the human being with a series of rational and useful tools to solve their conflicts.

So perhaps it is not such a bad idea to take some of their advice and apply it to our life as a couple, as it is to focus on facts and not on speculation.

It is vital to remember that we may have some misunderstanding about future or past plans, but judging or anticipating their feelings will only make us wrong assumptions.

Problems Of Couple – Get on the other’s skin.

Appealing to empathy with the other person is one of the most common advice whenever a discussion arises, but rarely is it practiced strictly.

This means that it would not be wrong to think how we would feel ourselves if our partner spat on us what we have just reproached, if we are really fair in making such accusations and if it comes to story.

Because probably the answer will be negative.

How To Make It Last Forever? 10 Tips For Keeping Love

Do not fail, the more we are in love, the more afraid we are to end it. It’s a normal feeling and it happens to almost everyone. And nobody wants to finish the good, right?

If you are with that special person and you think it can be the definitive, you know what they say: love, like plants, must be watered every day.

That is why, in order to keep your relationship always going well, read these 10 tips to keep love.

1. Accept your humanity

When we are in the period of falling in love, we see the other perfect person, like the ideal woman or man we have been looking for.

But, little by little, we realize that this is not so, and however marvelous the other person, we all have, besides our virtues, our defects, because we are human and we have to accept and love it like that, For if we accept our own humanity, we will accept the other.

2. Do not try to change it

Relationships are established from the most genuine part of us and when we feel accepted, we also feel loved. However, when someone sees how they try to change him, he may feel that he is not entirely wanted.

The consequence is that relations are distanced. Trying to change the other is impossible, and a waste of time and energy.

Tips For Keeping Love

Because a change, can only begin when one is really determined to do it, and not because other people say or want it.

3. Never force yourself to choose between something you love or like very much and you

Forcing a person to walk away from something or deprive himself of something he loves or wants, is almost to sign the death sentence in a relationship. When we do not support what he or she likes so much, to the point of not being able to live with it, it is better that we leave.

If, on the other hand, we put that person to choose, two things can happen, which are that you choose what you do not want and leave, or that you deprive yourself of what you are passionate about and always remember how it was put between the sword and Wall to leave it, which will become reproaches, sadness, etc. in the future.

4. Listening, silence and respect for problems with family or friends

A very simple way to avoid conflicts is not to think about the family or friends of others. We should never do it even if we are asked. We can see in the balance of a conflict between our partner and another person, with whom it has some emotional link.

In many occasions, before this, we have to listen and to be silent. Because the feelings you have with that person, your family or your friends, only he or she will understand.

And it can be difficult to understand for others from the outside. For this reason, he or she can forgive, overlook, etc., something that you think you would never do. This situation must be respected, and our opinion against it, will not have any positive effect on the relationship.

5. Put yourself in the place of the other and prior to mutual respect

How many discussions would be avoided, if we learned to put ourselves in the other person’s place, to understand why someone says what he says, why he acts in a certain way and respect it.

People can always come to an understanding, even if it seems impossible, if we make an effort to try to understand their point of view.

Regarding discussions or disagreements, it is also important that these should always be between the two, without linking to others or in the presence of third parties.

6. Space and meeting

Give each one his space is necessary, each couple will decide how this will be, depending on their way of being.

Some will understand how to spend a weekend alone with their friends, others to go a few hours to the gym, even others living in different houses.

All will be well, as long as the two agree on what the space should be like and be at ease. Just as important as this is to look for common activities, hobbies that appeal to both of you, and that allow you to spend some fun, doing something together that you enjoy a lot.

7. Spend time

Many times we are looking for children, family, co-workers, friends … and we forget about our partner. We think that as it is always there, and as we live with him or her, it will always be there.

But this is not so, and so we have to find a time each day, to talk about how we have gone, what we are thinking about, our plans, if there is something that worries us or we are wishing it to happen, etc.

Always from the positive point of view, highlighting the good things that have happened to us during the day. Also be interested in your mood and not take for granted that if something felt, I would tell you.

Nothing happens, to ask from time to time, with a smile, something of the style to are you happy ?, do you feel well?…

8. Deciros that you want

How important are the words and the way we have to talk. When someone loves you it shows and shows itself with many actions, but it does not hurt, that the feelings are also expressed.

Telling your partner that you love him never leaves him, even though he knows it and is sure of it.

Likewise, it is also important to use positive language, to emphasize its virtues, to make compliments and to smile. Here are some ideas to do it in an original way.

9. See yourself as a team

Support, be clear that you form a team, that if you both paddle in the same direction, things will go very well, the opposite of what will happen if each one pulls aside.

For this it is important not to generate tension, nor to try to push the other, and if you are in a moment of disagreement, it is better that you let any matter pass, until both of you are calm.

It is also basic not to make important decisions, until the situation calms down and everyone has understood the other’s point of view.

10. Try never to stop surprising

Having details as small as they are, is always something that is appreciated, but when these are not expected.

In detail, I am not referring to gifts or material things; I am referring to gestures or actions, with which you can show your feelings, and which cost nothing but which have a great impact on the happiness of the other person.