These murderers can be subtle in any relationship. They can also be brutal and cruel. These can be both. But ultimately the result is the same. INEVITABLE DEATH.
These are the murderers of a relationship.
All of us have some experience with these murderers – both as victims and as the murderer himself. But keep in mind that we are human. And these can be our natural responses.
The research conducted in relationships. He says they can predict with 95% accuracy whether a marriage will end in divorce within 15 years by the micro-analysis in a couple talking for an hour.
It has been identified as the “Four Horsemen” that are destructive in all relationships. Well, let’s see if any of these riders this galloping through your marriage or dating relationship.
1. The murderer of a relationship is contempt: This occurs in one of the couples with a negative character trait blamed as if the person is less and the other is superior.
This murderer indicators are:
* The insults such as “bitch, bastard, wimp, fat, stupid, ugly, lazy, lazy …”
* The hostile humor, sarcasm or mockery.
* Body language: tone of voice, facial expressions continued, eyes.
2. The defensive attitude. This is in response to any negative situation “is not my fault – it’s your fault This is to see yourself as a victim and the reaction is to protect against an attack – whether real or merely in the imagination ..
The indicators are:
* The fabricated excuses (eg, the circumstances are beyond my control)
* Talk to something with an attack – any complaints or criticisms with an attack.
* “Yes, you begin to accept, but then you say a” but “basically overrides anything that had already been agreed.
3. The murderer of obstruction: Leaving the relationship or leave the conversation as a way to avoid conflict. People think they are neutral and trying to keep the peace. But the clog or leave it really means disapproval, distance, separation, disconnection, and judgment.
This murderer indicators are:
* The silence
* The monosyllabic answers
* Change instantly topic
* Physically leave (ie leave the room)
Another of the murderers of a relationship is to criticize your partner.
4. The cruel Review: This attack is the personality or character of a person, usually with the intention of showing that you are right and your partner is wrong.
The indicators are:
* All generalizes: “Always …” “Never …” etc.
* “Why are you so …”
But the question here is what are the remedies to these asesisnos in our relationships? I will offer some suggestions.
– Learn to say specific things with specific data. Generalizations are not useful. “When you say this, I felt it.”
– Practice communicating with good intentions. That means saying “truth – no”. Direct truth “And listen more than talk.”
– Rate the feelings of your partner. That is what they are feeling. Their experiences. Refrain from telling them that they should not feel that way. That does not mean you agree. But his feelings are your feelings.
– Appreciate your partner. Tell your partner that you appreciate as it is. Usually, our complaints fornan 5% from the experiences with others. Focus on the 95% – and appreciated.
– Change your thoughts self-righteous or innocent victim with thoughts of responsibility and humility. Be kind and gentle with others – and indeed yourself.
Despite all these tips on the murderers of a relationship, I also recommend that you ask God to give you the kind of love that tdos find described in the Bible.
Marriage can be very good at times and other times it can be in a critical situation. I ask the question Would you be willing to submit to a lie detector test in front of your partner?
How would you answer the question, “Do you love your partner?” Are you still in love with your husband? How about, “If you had the chance to start again from the beginning, would you marry him or her?
Are these questions fill you nervous? mmm what would you answer? ¿Approve of or you flunk the test?
3 Mistakes can be making in your marriage.
Unless you’re the perfect man or woman is very likely that you’re making some mistakes in your marriage. It is normal that happen. The key to a great marriage is to learn from those mistakes and not have to go through the same mistake.
If you’re going to keep making mistakes, at least try to be different. Otherwise, you end up looking like a liar or just an individual not look selfish.
There are 3 mistakes you could be making in your marriage right now and that these errors may cause great pain, we will see these errors in your marriage.
1. Think about yourself.
The couples unite their lives with the idea of sharing their lives forever. Unfortunately, in many cases, it is just words in the wind, said in a wedding ceremony. However it happens, a few months after the marriage made, reality begins to raise his head.
The desire to meet the desires of everyone starts to be present in marriage. Here the problem is that the more one spouse seeks independence the other spouse begins with the suffocating control.
As is ending with two guys walking in opposite directions and the more you pull the rope, it accommodates more tension in the relationship. Over time the tension becomes too great and the marriage is dissolved.
2. Avoid the reality is another error in marriage.
There are many couples who live with closed eyes deny all or live in a fantasy land. They see marriage as the example of their parents and then take hers like it.
A beautiful house with large garden, 2 beautiful children and a couple of vehicles of the year does not bring happiness in marriage. If that were the case, simply because wealthy people would never divorce.
The reality in this world is that every marriage has its ups and downs. You have to work on strengthening it every day, it’s a constant work. If you want to have a good marriage, you must be honest with your feelings and be real. Avoid what happens in day to day will hurt your marriage in the long run.
3. Losing your best friend.
Most couples were best friends before marriage, there was one or the other better than you. They are talking about anything and everything. Both they drank from the same cup and eat from the same plate.
The question is here When was the last time you had with your spouse of a single dish and they kissed in the middle of scoops? Remember romantic walks anywhere just walking?
Your husband and wife was and should be your best friend. It is not as if the two live in separate states. However, sometimes different interests in marriage and friendship that existed fades slowly develop.
You must avoid the mistake of losing your best friend, if you really want to keep that unbreakable union in your marriage.
I hope that in your marriage more good than bad days happen. If not, now you need to change things before it’s too late. I do not believe in divorce, except in cases of actual abuse.
But I know it’s hard being in a relationship where you feel there is no hope. Please do not give up. If you need more advice on how to save your marriage, Click here; help in your marriage.