Do not fail, the more we are in love, the more afraid we are to end it. It’s a normal feeling and it happens to almost everyone. And nobody wants to finish the good, right?
If you are with that special person and you think it can be the definitive, you know what they say: love, like plants, must be watered every day.
That is why, in order to keep your relationship always going well, read these 10 tips to keep love.
1. Accept your humanity
When we are in the period of falling in love, we see the other perfect person, like the ideal woman or man we have been looking for.
But, little by little, we realize that this is not so, and however marvelous the other person, we all have, besides our virtues, our defects, because we are human and we have to accept and love it like that, For if we accept our own humanity, we will accept the other.
2. Do not try to change it
Relationships are established from the most genuine part of us and when we feel accepted, we also feel loved. However, when someone sees how they try to change him, he may feel that he is not entirely wanted.
The consequence is that relations are distanced. Trying to change the other is impossible, and a waste of time and energy.
Because a change, can only begin when one is really determined to do it, and not because other people say or want it.
3. Never force yourself to choose between something you love or like very much and you
Forcing a person to walk away from something or deprive himself of something he loves or wants, is almost to sign the death sentence in a relationship. When we do not support what he or she likes so much, to the point of not being able to live with it, it is better that we leave.
If, on the other hand, we put that person to choose, two things can happen, which are that you choose what you do not want and leave, or that you deprive yourself of what you are passionate about and always remember how it was put between the sword and Wall to leave it, which will become reproaches, sadness, etc. in the future.
4. Listening, silence and respect for problems with family or friends
A very simple way to avoid conflicts is not to think about the family or friends of others. We should never do it even if we are asked. We can see in the balance of a conflict between our partner and another person, with whom it has some emotional link.
In many occasions, before this, we have to listen and to be silent. Because the feelings you have with that person, your family or your friends, only he or she will understand.
And it can be difficult to understand for others from the outside. For this reason, he or she can forgive, overlook, etc., something that you think you would never do. This situation must be respected, and our opinion against it, will not have any positive effect on the relationship.
5. Put yourself in the place of the other and prior to mutual respect
How many discussions would be avoided, if we learned to put ourselves in the other person’s place, to understand why someone says what he says, why he acts in a certain way and respect it.
People can always come to an understanding, even if it seems impossible, if we make an effort to try to understand their point of view.
Regarding discussions or disagreements, it is also important that these should always be between the two, without linking to others or in the presence of third parties.
6. Space and meeting
Give each one his space is necessary, each couple will decide how this will be, depending on their way of being.
Some will understand how to spend a weekend alone with their friends, others to go a few hours to the gym, even others living in different houses.
All will be well, as long as the two agree on what the space should be like and be at ease. Just as important as this is to look for common activities, hobbies that appeal to both of you, and that allow you to spend some fun, doing something together that you enjoy a lot.
7. Spend time
Many times we are looking for children, family, co-workers, friends … and we forget about our partner. We think that as it is always there, and as we live with him or her, it will always be there.
But this is not so, and so we have to find a time each day, to talk about how we have gone, what we are thinking about, our plans, if there is something that worries us or we are wishing it to happen, etc.
Always from the positive point of view, highlighting the good things that have happened to us during the day. Also be interested in your mood and not take for granted that if something felt, I would tell you.
Nothing happens, to ask from time to time, with a smile, something of the style to are you happy ?, do you feel well?…
8. Deciros that you want
How important are the words and the way we have to talk. When someone loves you it shows and shows itself with many actions, but it does not hurt, that the feelings are also expressed.
Telling your partner that you love him never leaves him, even though he knows it and is sure of it.
Likewise, it is also important to use positive language, to emphasize its virtues, to make compliments and to smile. Here are some ideas to do it in an original way.
9. See yourself as a team
Support, be clear that you form a team, that if you both paddle in the same direction, things will go very well, the opposite of what will happen if each one pulls aside.
For this it is important not to generate tension, nor to try to push the other, and if you are in a moment of disagreement, it is better that you let any matter pass, until both of you are calm.
It is also basic not to make important decisions, until the situation calms down and everyone has understood the other’s point of view.
10. Try never to stop surprising
Having details as small as they are, is always something that is appreciated, but when these are not expected.
In detail, I am not referring to gifts or material things; I am referring to gestures or actions, with which you can show your feelings, and which cost nothing but which have a great impact on the happiness of the other person.
There is nothing more intense and rewarding than being in love, than having a partner who loves us and whom we want. But we must go carefully and not fall into the error of giving absolutely everything for that person … Therefore, we explain to you what dimensions you must protect above all else.
1. Do not give “everything” without receiving “never” anything in return
It’s a mistake we usually fall into. To love someone is to open all our emotions without finding any limits, giving everything for passion and sincere altruism. And that is good, no doubt.
But as long as the other person responds to us and shows us that every effort is worthwhile, that every gesture is reinforced by a sincere love where there is no selfishness.
If we give everything without receiving more than demands or reproaches, there will come a time when we feel frustrated and very empty. This feeling is very destructive and we have to take it very seriously. Love, offer, give … but remember that you also deserve the same.
2. Do not destroy your self-esteem or your values
In a couple it is usual that there are different tastes, hobbies and even values. But as long as there is respect and recognition everything will work well. You can allow your partner, for example, to value spontaneity, fun, partying a lot …
But you also demand that this time share it also with you and that in turn, value that you from time to time ask for more quiet and intimate days at home. There must be a balance.
But if the other person criticizes us because we are not “so fun” or so party-loving, then we will feel bad and start doubting ourselves. Will I be a boring person for real? Will I be a person with whom he can not be happy?
These kinds of questions can do a lot of damage to your self-esteem. Our partners must respect and value us. Is essential. If there is no respect there can be no happiness.
3. Do not invade or destroy your personal space
All of us have our hobbies, our friends, our passions … things that we can not give up. Never leave families and friends aside for your partner.
Do not give up everything you like for your partner, because otherwise you will not have anything left and you will lose your identity. Personal space are those intimate spaces where our personality, our social life and our passions are. Do not overlook it.
4. Do not erase your dreams and your hopes
Sometimes, we maintain affective relationships with toxic partners. People who cut our wings and tell us, day after day, that we are not capable of this or that thing.
That we are not intelligent to do certain activity, that the work that we long to get will not achieve because we do not give size.
Personalities that day after day are cutting our wings and our aspirations making our personality a caricature where there is hardly any energy or energy. Do not let that happen.
5. Do not let them turn you into an unhappy person.
It is the most important. When you wake up every morning ask yourself if you are happy. Ask yourself if the person next to you is the one you want to grow old with, who will accompany your maturity and who will live next to your hand in harmony and tranquility.
If it brings you security, maturity and illusion, do not hesitate, that relationship is worth it and you must fight for it.
Worse if you feel empty and you perceive that that couple does not give you smiles but tears, and that you live your days with great sadness, you must react. You deserve to be happy. It is the vital right of every person.